ADULT: The RULES OF LIFE - from NOWHERE

THE RULES of life...
...there WILL be a test later!

Deus, dona mihi serenitatem accipere res quae non possum mutare, fortitudinem mutare res quae possum, atque sapientiam cognoscere.
No good deed goes UNPUNISHED.
Nature abhors a vacuum.
The 1,200,000 years spent on the Plains of Africa define the template for all human behavior.
Remember the Alamo Ч when help was on the way Ч it's better here and nowЕ
-Neil Young
Shut up!!! 'You don't have to explain what you don't say' -Strom Thurmond (Over 48 years in politics)
Take away the road and no one will remember how many jouneysЕ
-America (Bunnell)
The same thing that makes you live Ч can kill you in the endЕ
-Neil Young
Do it Ч 'In 20 years you will regret the things you didn't do more than the things you did.' - Mark Twain.
"People are about as happy as they make up their minds to be" Ч Abe Lincoln.
Tell NO TRUTH before its timeЕ
You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!
Never put the bad news first.
Cleverness, hard work and dedication will earn you the wrath of those lacking any one of those traits.
Add a glass of sewage to a barrel of wine and you get a barrel of sewage. But add a glass of wine to barrel of sewage and you still have sewage.
Thus: a minute amount of bad undoes a huge amount of good.
"Trying is the first step toward failure" --Homer Simpson.
Compliment the intelligent for their beauty and the beautiful for their intelligence. -Giacomo Casanova.
Never confuse power with process.
Take NOTHING on faith.
Never confuse curiosity for concern.
No matter how malicious you think people might become they can still surprize you.
The law of escalating stupidity: for every error or mistake there's an increasing likelihood it will be repeated.
Just because a question is asked doesn't mean it has to be answered.
To succeed, find out what others want Ч then make them believe you can deliver that.
"Give people what they want Ч they'll come!" -Red Skelton remarking a huge crowd attending Harry Cone's funeral. (Also know as The First Rule of Show Business.)
The lesson of the RMS TITANIC: not everything that's able to destroy you will necessarily be big enough to be seen in time to be avoided.
Nothing succeeds like the past -Robertson Davies
People are never satisfied Ч remember: the more you give them, the more they will demand.
Magnanimity is the highest vindictive.
No matter who you are and what you do: in the end you lose.
Friends are people you use to feel good about yourself. (American Beauty)
What people fear you might do to them Ч will always be done to you.
Never fall in love. (It is NOT better to have loved and lost. Love does NOT overcome all. As the man said: Only love can break your heart...
Friends may come and friends may go -- but a true enemy will last a life time.
Never give 100% Ч unless you want to lose 100%
Always think: contingencies.
Never date anyone having a homepage or website.
For every action there's always an appropriate inaction.
EVERY action has consequences.
Too much foresight can cause blindness.
...do what only lovers can: make a gift out of necessity. -Leonard Cohen
Never marry.
True selflessness flows from misunderstanding. Put yourself first especially in matters of love.
Never argue with idiots Ч they'll always manage to bring you down to their level where they use their superior experience in stupidity to defeat you.
"People see what they want to see Ч and disregard the rest." -The Boxer (Paul Simon)
We don't see things the way they are we see them as we are.
"It is the customary fate of new truths to begin as heresies and to end as superstitions" ЧT. H. Huxley
"Within thirty years, we will have the technological means to create superhuman intelligence. Shortly after, the human era will be ended." ааа -- Vernor Vinge, 1993
"Computers are useless. They can only give you answers." Ч Pablo Picasso.
In the rich man's house there is no where to spit but in his face. -Diogenes
If in doubt Ч always let your gut decide.
Pay little heed to what people are saying, but ignore what they do at your peril.
NEVER ask an important question if you don't already know the answer.-Horace Rumpole, from John Mortimer's Rumpole of the Bailey.
Benign neglect is an oxymoron.
If you say you don't want very much; you'll be lucky if you get any.
First impressions always count FOREMOST.
There's no fool like an OLD FOOL.
An ounce of fear is worth tons of forewarning.
Accepted truth seldom is.
When faced with the inevitable Ч let the inevitable happen -Pierre Trudeau.
It often takes the most brilliant mind to do something truly fucking dumb.
You may get more; or you may get less Ч but you never get the respect you deserve.
Facts are rarely a match for blissful ignorance.
Action begets reaction.
Exercise care when taking the bull by the horns Ч use extreme caution when taking the cow by the...
After participating in an orgy and being invited back the very next evening, Voltaire declined with the following explanation: "Once, a philosopher, twice, a pervert!"
Fill in the blank: What sex is to a man, money is to a _______.
WHO and WHEN are usually more important than how, why or where.
You get too soon old AND too late smart.
You can't live in the past Ч or the present or the futureЕ -Al Bundy Married With Children.
NEVER SLEEPS!
Destiny always prevails.
Final RULE: Never cut down other people's trees.